April 23, 2010

My Cousin, My Brother, My Friend

A Poem for James…

I’ve loved you my whole life, so it’s hard to let go

Even now, writing these words, the tears freely flow

Can’t sleep at night, mind full of thoughts, grief and sorrow

Wishing God would bring you back, from my life span He could borrow

Every day came as a sweet comfort knowing you were always there

Reminding me that Friday’s weren’t about work but set aside for Jumah Prayer

Who knew the day would come so soon when we wouldn’t breathe the same air

Wish I had a warning, a word, a sign, so my heart could prepare.

As you walk the path with Angels towards God’s divine light

Adding another soul to His body making it shine ever bright

Not just my big cousin I would see, caught the true glimpse through God’s sight

Protector was your role; my brother is the title that fits just right.

There’s a hole in my heart, that piece carried on the journey with you

Just like the talks we’ve had before, I’ll end this poetic conversation

As-Salaam Alaikum, I love you too.

- Amuri

Brand New Bag April 9, 2010

Not the kind papa had on the James Brown Song though. So now my new knowledge interest is Gnosticism (did I spell that correctly?). What is it you ask? I do too so here’s the merriam webster definition:
: the thought and practice especially of various cults of late pre-Christian and early Christian centuries distinguished by the conviction that matter is evil and that emancipation comes through gnosis

Still confused? Me too…or at least I was until I dug a bit deeper. It focuses on your true origin, your true nature and returning to that essence. You can reach for that higher reality and the path to that is held within. It reminds me of Jesus in the Gospel of Luke when he was sitting at dinner with the Pharasees and Lawyers. The pharasees was somewhat taken aback by Jesus sitting down to eat without washing his hands first. I can’t lie. I would give a side ways look as well. Jesus said to the man (according to King James Luke Chapter 11) “And the Lord said unto him, Now do ye Pharisees make clean the outside of the cup and the platter; but your inward part is full of ravening and wickedness.Ye fools, did not he, that made that which is without, make that which is within also?” Basically, where is the focus on what’s happening with the spirit. Our churches, mosques, homes, cars and sometimes bodies are so beatifully built and well kept, but the inside is rotting or rotten to the core.

This lost knowledge of self can seep through via “psychic” activity. Could this be the link that brings some type of meaning and direction to my dreams? We shall see.

Ignored You April 9, 2010

I have greatly ignored and abandoned my poor blog site. It’s not like I do not have a plethera (spelling) of information to put to pad, but actually typing them out has fallen short. Don’t want this to be a complain or dark blog with alot of introspection turned into a movie about depression. That’s not what I’m about. I do have happy thoughts too !

With an entire side of my family being gone, things have been at a loss. I knew the day would come, just never wanted it to be. Who does? *looking for a show of hands* So now the work begins of maintaining their legacy and creating new family memories with those of us left. Too bad not everyone is in agreement. It would be nice to have a dinner or something with all of us, however some is better than none. Durham, NC has a new Daniels Family on some old land.

Still twitching to get to DC. Scared of the end of the days though. Every movie, every prohecy, every sign points to something big and terrible happening there. Thanks, but no thanks. That doesn’t stop the desire to move Maybe it’s the danger that attracts me. Staying in ATL long term is not in the cards. I know that with a great deal of certainty. A talk with the ex revealed the concept of a soul city. Not a city with collard greens and sweaty blues clubs, but one that matches your spiritual essence. It’s like love at first sight, but for a place. This is my anti-soul city. It’s more like the antimatter that causes a big explosion…of course the not controlled cool movie version that affects no one in real life.