After surviving the fever. BTW I fell asleep warming water for the tea…IN THE MICROWAVE. I got up ready to start the cleanse. So I start with the Salt Water Flush. My first mistake: Doing this. Second mistake: Taking other’s experiences as gospel. Third mistake: Doing it anyway. Now having a day off was a good idea. I don’t think I would have survived at work. So I drank the equivalent of a liter of the Atlantic Ocean without the fun and waves. Immediately I felt awful. Now…it could have been the fact that not only did I drink a body of water, but I also decided it was the proper time to clean the kitchen. What the hell was I thinking? Well rather than self, I cursed out a friend…not actually to him but to him via the air in my house.
Apparently my body missed being 8 months pregnant and decided it was time to look like it. My stomach became bloated and hard. After 2 hrs that of misery without movement, I called my homie Todd to get his first hand account. You know what he says…”Why did you do that?” Whatthehamsammich? Now, ChildOnsetAlzheimers, COA for short, could be the culprit in my forgetting an entire conversation on why he didn’t do the SWF, but I’m still skeptical that said convo took place. OR maybe it’s just “female hates to ever be wrong” pride. Anywho, it was too late to go back because after I apologized for non-verbally cursing him out, Poseidon felt it was time to release the Kracken! Well in my case it’s the CRACK-IN.
No need for details, you can get the picture. Anyway, it’s been an hour and I’m not done, just taking a break. Overall, I think the SWF is a good thing if you want to do a one day detox. But remember, that one day may turn out to be ALL DAY and it’s the only thing you may be able to do.
